Monday, July 15, 2019

Everything Changes

Will you resist change or roll with it? #change #essays #livingwell



"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it." - Alan Watts

I had a tiny existential crisis earlier this season when I logged into Instagram after taking a three-month hiatus. Some of my favorite accounts had drastically changed in the period of time that I was away. It was a shock. A jolt that made me question what I was even doing on Instagram and how the changes I made influenced the people who followed me, but it also made me wonder if I had neglected to venture out on a new course out of my fear and resistance of change.

There were two specific profiles that started this thought process for me. One gained international attention after she began posting photos of her toddler and the family puppy taking naps together. Her feed was loaded with these images and they were so cute. Some viral website shared a few of her photos and she gained thousands of followers overnight. Everyone adored the drowsy duo. 

The other profile was a woman who Photoshopped these amazing scenes that looked like they were a page of Alice in Wonderland, come to life. They were dark and moody but had a spark of magic to them, with leaves floating around her head in a self-portrait or fireflies twinkling around her daughter while she played in her crib. She even created tutorials on her blog for people who wanted to try their hand in this art form.

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This woman no longer shares the dreamy creative pictures and has instead become a fashion influencer; her feed is full of posed portraits featuring the latest trends and her favorite accessories. The mom of the cute kid and dog stopped posting her famous images, mainly because they have grown out of the napping age, but also because I believe she felt a need to use her platform for something more than self-promotion. Along with sharing more real-life adventures in her family, she now focuses on political and cultural topics, using her voice to raise awareness on important issues.

Everything changes. Nothing stays the same. And it stretches far beyond the realm of Instagram into every aspect of our lives. I began following these two women because of what they posted at the time, but like us all, they evolved into something new, and I certainly can't expect them not to. They didn't owe me anything. 


We have become so resistant to change, but the truth is, it is happening whether we want it to or not. The people in our lives are changing. Landscapes, routines, roles, seasons, life cycles - all changing. We live in a fluid world and the question is whether we will resist the change or whether we will roll with it, evolving along with everything else.

The reason I struggled so much with these changes on Instagram (let's be real - they were inconsequential when looking at the big picture) was that I was so accustomed to the way things were. I was used to my feed looking a certain way, and at first, it was a disappointment that was no longer the case. 

I then began thinking about what the reaction would be if I made such a change. I wouldn't want to stick to the status quo just because a handful of people expected me to. I would want to be able to follow my heart in the direction I knew I was supposed to be headed, and the opinions of others shouldn't affect that. And that's exactly what these two women did - follow their hearts and make the changes necessary to advance in a new direction.


When faced with change, you can do one of two things. You can resist change or you can roll with it. You can adapt and figure out a new way to embrace it, or you can walk away. With these two women on Instagram, I knew I'd have to learn to find a new way to connect or move on. In the end, I did both. I chose to unfollow one, as she was no longer producing content I was interested in. The other, I still follow because I love that she is using her platform to raise awareness on important issues and ones that aligned with my own values.

This Instagram example is only a tiny fragment of all the change that's going on in our lives every day, and the outcome of my dilemma really wasn't a big deal, but it made me aware of how resistant to change I had become. I was able to process my reaction to these changes and apply them to the big picture.

Change is something we will always have to deal with. Our relationships will evolve. We'll accept new employment opportunities. Our kids will grow up. We'll move house. We'll lose loved ones. The world around us will begin to look different. And yes, our favorite Instagrammers will flip the script and start posting content that is completely foreign to what we're used to. So will you resist the change or will you roll with it?

How do you deal with change?

The post Everything Changes first appeared on A Simpler Grace. If you enjoyed this article, please feel free to share it with your friends! Don't forget to join the ASG Tribe!

32 comments:

  1. Amen! Change is always uncomfortable at first. I know I really struggle with it at first, but I've come to realize I'm a lot more open to making necessary changes since becoming a parent, oddly enough.

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  2. I struggle so much with change. It has always been hard for me. But it is a part of life so I try to roll with it. I try to practice extra self care in times of change.

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  3. This read made me think so much and it made me realized how hard is change for me! It's not easy but I know that it's very necessary for our life.
    Changes are good too.

    www.wandure.com

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  4. Change can be so hard, but necessary at times.

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  5. Change is one of those things that's just tough for anyone, and I love how you approached this!

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  6. Ugh, change is hard. But also good and often necessary, but that doesn't make the transition any easier.

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  7. Yes! Self-care in times of change is so important!

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  8. That's interesting that becoming a parent has altered the way you handle change.

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  9. Thanks for coming by to read, Mila! <3

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  10. I used to hold on for dear life and fight change. But life has set me on a path that is constantly changing. And I am learning to bend. Not break! And honestly, I have never felt better. Now when things don't turn out like I was expecting, I can usually get through it with out feeling like my world is crashing down around me. Its refreshing and weird all at once!

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  11. It's definitely a learning curve, but I'm glad you have adjusted how you react to change. <3

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  12. Tabitha Bradley-RainesJuly 15, 2019 at 8:49 PM

    I typically see change as an adventure. It makes me stronger and changes me in ways I could never have imagined.

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  13. Christa Del GiornoJuly 16, 2019 at 12:43 AM

    I moved cross country a few years ago. Whenever I go back to the eats coast to visit, it’s so different from how I remember it. I guess there’s this expectation that time will freeze even if I move on, so I really relate to this post.

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  14. Change is hard but necessary I guess! I always try to evolve and be flexible!!

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  15. I've had the same experience. It's crazy how quickly our old towns and cities are changing. Isn't it?

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  16. Kelsie KleinmeyerJuly 16, 2019 at 9:08 AM

    You're so right- we are always changing, but it can be for the best if we decide to make it that way!

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  17. This is a beautiful piece, Lecy. It's hard when things change when you're used to how it's always been--especially when you valued the way it was.

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  18. Thanks for coming by to read, Sarah! <3

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  19. It's interesting that something as constant as change is so hard for so many of us. That's something I have a hard time wrapping my head around. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your thoughts and experience on this.

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  20. Thanks for coming by to read, Lindsey!

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  21. When we're closer to the thing that changes, I think we often don't notice It's like when you see someone after a long time, and they say "wow, you've lost weight!" or "your hair is so much longer now!" They have a frame of reference for us in the past. It's frozen.

    If we're close, the change can seem more subtle.

    I take change at face value. I also feel like no change is permanent. If a friendship fades or a connection goes away, I simply move on. And if it returns, we'll see if it's as strong or relavant. If it is, it's as if nothing ever changed.

    Even though everything has.

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  22. You're so right! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. :)

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  23. That last paragraph. Love it. Encapsulates my life since Friday. I have been trying 2 roll with it but danggggg the roller coaster that is my life went wild, lost the conductor, and we are hanging on for dear life.
    This was great. I've never used Insta before but I think in your email I had mentioned following certain bloggers and feeling like because my house was eclectic and NOT white I was not cliquey enough. Made me question myself. Well you know what, I dont follow them anymore. I dont do white unless its paper or a nnew canvas. I both live and love my life in color.

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  24. Oh, Brittany, I'm sorry to hear things are hectic for you right now. I'm with you on not feeling cliquey enough for the trendsetters on Instagram. I've noticed a huge difference between the side of Instagram where people are using the platform to make money and the side where people are connecting with their community. I prefer the later. Your personality is so colorful and I hope you never change that! <3

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  25. Tobia | craftaliciousmeAugust 7, 2019 at 2:09 AM

    I feel like the older I get the more comfortable I get with my situation. I wouldn’t say I’d be resisting change but it’s such an effort. But every once in a while I believe it’s necessary to mix things up to get new perspectives.

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